Security Specialist, Abolitionist, Anabaptist
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Leaf That Came Out Too Early Cold As Shit

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toddgrotenhuis
6 days ago
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Indianapolis
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Life: 10 Telltale Signs That Daddy’s Home

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Every kid knows that the house is just DIFFERENT once Daddy’s crawled inside!
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toddgrotenhuis
7 days ago
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Honorable Mention for Best Horror Fic of the year.
Indianapolis
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NCAA Tournament Really Disrupting Man’s Ability To Get Any Fucking Around Done

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CHICAGO—Calling the games a “complete time suck,” 32-year-old junior sales associate Collin Hiller told reporters Friday that the NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has really been affecting his ability to get any fucking around done. “Normally I’d be busy doing jack shit at the office right now, but today I’ve been completely distracted from that by all these games,” said Hiller, who had only intended for the tournament to serve as a brief break from aimlessly browsing YouTube, but instead spent the last three hours glued to the online broadcast at NCAA.com. “Christ, I’m so behind on checking out pictures of infinity pools, and there’s still a ton of crap to read on Twitter I haven’t even started yet. I want to catch the rest of this game, but I feel a little guilty not Gchatting with my girlfriend or just dicking around ...

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toddgrotenhuis
7 days ago
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Indianapolis
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Convict Sentenced To Generating $80,000 To $100,000 In Profits For Private Prison

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OLNEY SPRINGS, CO—After being tried and convicted of armed robbery and two counts of aggravated assault, local 24-year-old Elijah Rudin was officially sentenced Friday to generating $80,000 to $100,000 in profits for the privately held Crowley County Correctional Facility. “The defendant is hereby ordered to create a minimum of $80,000 in net profits at a medium security prison owned and operated by the CoreCivic corporation,” said Judge Gary Mueller, adding that Rudin will be processed the following day at Crowley County prison, where he will remain incarcerated until he has produced at least a 1.25 percent increase in CoreCivic’s stock valuation. “I believe this sentence is an appropriate punishment given the nature of Mr. Rudin’s crimes, the harm caused to his victims, and the fact that Crowley County Prison will qualify for a generous government stipend for housing a minimum number of inmates ...

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toddgrotenhuis
8 days ago
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Indianapolis
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maybe she’s born with it

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okay, she was only technically BORN with it. it was applied prior to her birth.

also it has to be retouched every 20 years

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toddgrotenhuis
8 days ago
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Indianapolis
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#1497 – Sad (No Comments)

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#1497 – Sad

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toddgrotenhuis
12 days ago
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Indianapolis
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